Eminem - Almost famous lyrics

Yeah, can't stop now
This may be the last chance I get,
To be famous

You dream of trading places,
I have been changing faces
You can not fill these shoes,
There is too much to lose
I wake up behind these trenches,
You run around defenseless
There is too much to lose,
You can not fill these shoes
(I just wanna be famous but)
Be careful what you wish for!

I stuck my dick in this game like a rapist,
They call me Slim Roethlisberger
I go beserker than a fed up post office worker
A murker wit a Mossberg,
I'm pissed off, get murdered
Like someone took a ketchup squirter,
Squirted a frankfurter
For a gangster, ya sure did shit your pants
When you saw that chainsaw get to waivin' like a terrible towel
How thangs turn around, when his fangs come out
Get your brains blown out,
That's what I call blowin' your mind
When I cum back like nut on your spine
I'm the thumb tack that you slept on, son
Now here I come screamin' "Attack!" like I just stepped on one
Low on the totem, till he showed 'em,
Defiance, giant scrotum
He don't owe dem bitches shit,
His britches he outgrowed 'em
He's so out cold, he's knocked out at the South Pole
And nobody fucks with him,
Rigor mortis and post mortem
He's dyin' of boredom,
Take your best rhymes, record 'em
To try and thwart him
He'll just take your punch lines and snort 'em
Shit stained drawers,
You gon' fuck wit a guy who licks the blades of his chainsaws?
While he dips 'em in PF Chang sauce
Games off homie,
Hang it up like some crank calls
You think I'm backin' down,
You must be outta your dang skulls
I'm almost famous.

You dream of trading places,
I have been changing faces
You can not fill these shoes,
There is too much to lose
I wake up behind these trenches,
You run around defenseless
There is too much to lose,
You can not fill these shoes
(I just wanna be famous but)
Be careful what you wish for!

I'm back for revenge,
I lost the battle, that ain't happenin' again
I'm at your throat, like strep,
I step, strapped with a pen
Metaphors wrote on my hand,
Some are just stored in my memory,
Some are wrote on a napkin,
I do what I have to to win
Pullin' out all stops,
Any who touch a mic prior's,
Not even Austin Powers,
How the fuck are they Mike Meyers?
And tell that psycho to pass the torch
To the wacko 'fore I take a shit in his jack-o-latern
And smash it on his porch
Now, get off my dick
Dick's too short of a word for my dick
Get off my antidisestablishmentarianism, you prick
Don't call me the champ,
Call me the space shuttle destroyer
I just blew up the Challenger,
Matter fact, I need a lawyer
I just laced my gloves with enough plaster
To make a cast beat his ass naked,
And peed in his corner like Vern Troyer
Y'all are Eminem backwards,
You're meni me's
See he's in a whole 'nother weight class
He slugs you're bb's,
You're bean bag bullets
You're full of it
You were dissin' his CDs
Laughed at Infinite
Now he's back like someone pissed in his Wheaties
No peace treaties,
He's turned into a beast,
His new Slim Shady EP's
Got the attention of the mighty D-R-E
He's almost famous

You dream of trading places,
I have been changing faces
You can not fill these shoes,
There is too much to lose
I wake up behind these trenches,
You run around defenseless
There is too much to lose,
You can not fill these shoes
(I just wanna be famous but)
Be careful what you wish for!

Now there he goes in Dre's studio,
Cuppin' his balls,
Screamin' the wood off the panelin',
Cussin' the paint of the walls,
Spewin' his hate to these haters,
Showin' no love for these broads,
He ain't givin' 'em shit,
He says he'll pinch a penny so hard
He'll leave a bruise on the bronze so dark
You can see the mark when it scars
'Til Abraham Lincoln is screamin' out "Ahh!"
His metaphors and similes ain't similar to them, not at all
If they don't like it,
They can all get fucked instead of suckin' him off
They can go get a belt or a necktie to hang themselves by
Like David Carradine they can go fuck themselves
And just die and eat shit while they're at it
He's fuckin' had it,
He's mad at the whole world
So go to hell and build a snowman, girl
The bully's become bullied,
If pussies get pushed,
Then they better pull me,
Take me back to ninth grade to school me
'Cause I ain't lookin' back, only forward
This whole spot, blow it
Who could have known he'd grow to be a poet and not know it?
And while I'm being poetic,
Let me get historic,
And raise the bar,
Higher than my opinion of these women's been lowered
So bare witness to some biblical shit
There's a cold wind blowin'
This world ain't gonna know what hit it,
He did it,
He made it,
He's finally famous.