Q Strange - Why I'm F'd Up lyrics

Chorus

People wanna know why Im so fucked up
Could it be because of the way I grew up
I didnt have much and these times were tough
And I deal with this pain as a grown adult

Verse

Grownin up was rough even though I had love
I came up in an environment with violence and drugs
My my mom was an addict I was too young to see this
I be playin doctor with the hyperdermic needles
She told me not to touch'em they were for her boyfriends medicine
I guess his sickness was addiction like hers it was heroin
I'd see the bruises on her face she'd tell me that she fell
Innocence prevailed and I believed her fairy tales
Sometimes I hear him hit her and I'd hide under the covers
Listen to the terrifying screams from my motha
Vowing that one day I'd be big enough to beat him
But now I am I hope to god that I dont ever meet'em
My father bailed out when I was still a little infant
I see'em now and then but didn't know him whats the difference
He was an alcoholic anyway or so they say
So I guess I didn't need him in my life anyway
My mom got clean and sober when that boyfriend shit was over
Just a matter of time before it came back and took over
Growin up in the projects on food stamps and welfare
Kids crackin on my sneakers never had a new pair
Mom did remarry though when I was thirteen
But it seems that her fream man turned out to be a dope fiend
Another one, shootin up and gettin fucked up
And then yall wonder why I never been drunk or do drugs
And then in Highschool I fucked up I didn't pay attention
Fuck detention and suspension, I aint doin this Im jettin
At 16 my whole world came to a hault
I lost my mother to the devil and I felt it was my fault
She was all that I had, now Im sittin all alone
16 years old tryne to make it on my own
Aint never graduated cuz I didnt even bother
Man I coulda been somebody if I I tried a little harder
Workin full time for a minimum wage
Wishin I was on stage it wasnt just a faze
Dreaming of being the next rap star sensation
I broke the hell out and took a permanent vacation
Depression hittin harder yeah I even thought of suicide
Its do or die, and I aint doin shit so I dont even try and
Gettin high is all the peeps around me seem to do
And I aint goin that route, so I always stay true
But now life is good I gotta wife that I love
And a son in my world and I aint fuckin this up
So there you have it now ya know why Im so fucked up
And how a troubled child grows up a troubled adult
But now I gotta chance to do things right for my son
Keep him safe from these drugs and these thugs packin guns
I'll make it in this world and I aint gonna go and quit
Channel all this negative into positive shit

(xx) Chorus